Month: November 2014

Pre-conception   

IMG_1115(photo credit Diemstudiosinc)

When my husband and I first met, one important quality (among many) we both hoped for in a partner was someone who shared strong family values. To some, immediate and extended family may not be of particular importance but for each of us, this was simply intrinsic. One day we would hope to be blessed with a tight-knit family of our own.

After we got married and purchased our first home, we felt ready for the next step in our lives. Like a lot of new couples, we wanted to ease our way into parent-hood. So after lengthy research, we rescued 2 retired racing greyhounds from Greyhound Relocation and Adoption Canada! They fit so wonderfully into our new little family and we thought to ourselves, “Okay, we are ready”.

So what happens next besides the obvious?!

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 (photo credit Diemstudiosinc)

Well, why not do our best to be our healthiest for each other and our future little one by taking a look at our mind, body and spirit?

We researched as much as we could online, in books and asked our loved ones for conception tips and tricks for when we would start trying to conceive (TTC)  WhattoExpect.com is a great resource. We had deliberate conversations on child rearing practices/decisions and ensured that dialogue was always open. Onlookers could always tell whenever we got too busy to check-in with one another. :)

Before conceiving, my husband and I began cleansing our bodies of excessive processed foods, junk, alcohol and stayed away from potential teratogens. We ate more nutrient dense foods and I began taking these all natural vitamins. Of course, these lifestyle changes are great no matter what if going on in your life. We scheduled pre-conception doctor appointments to check for any anomalies and kept up our work out routines.

Lastly but definitely not least, we continued to nurture our growing faith, through prayer, study and shared our daily devotionals.

It all seem pretty obvious one might say however, unless we are deliberate in each of these areas, they can quickly be placed on the backburner and fizzle out. This will then directly reflect on the relationship which will suffer.

So, all things considered despite our age, we figured getting pregnant would be easy. Was the aforementioned enough? Did any of it matter? Were we being naïve?

Stay tuned for future post on Trying to Conceive (TTC)

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First Comes Love…

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 (photo credit Diemstudiosinc)

Although it seems like an eternity,  my husband and I have been together for 3.5 years. We fell in love at first sight and knew we would spend the rest of our lives together.  But what waslove to us? How did it differ this time from other “loves” in the past? How would this “love” last? To me, as an upwards of 50% of marriages these days end up in divorce, searching for what propels the other 50% to not only last, but thrive was imperative.

 Growing up, I had what many young women had…a fairy tale dream of what life would ultimately be like. One day I would find a wonderful husband, have an impermeable marriage, and beautiful family. But after a few failed relationships and a seeking heart, I wondered if that dream only existed in my conjured Utopia. Feeling hopeless and only after exhausting all other options, did I pray.

 I soon realized that my past longterm relationships were my attempt to subconsciously force that fairy tale ideal into fruition. Or worse, blissfully yet dangerously, ignore the warning signs or lack of the natural qualities/ values/ belief system that jived with mine. What I thought was love, was the farthest thing from it.

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 (photo credit Diemstudiosinc)

After being primed to understand what love certainly was not, its’ true definition was, at last, presented to me in the form of my husband. (Awwwwwe:) He was not Mr. Dream or Mr. Perfect like the fairy tale I had envisioned. He was, afterall, human just like me and soulfully flawed. However, there exists a presence of immaterial, unspeakable, unmatched connection for one another and a joint understanding of what love would be to us.

A stale, stagnant or dissolving state is what many marriages fall victim to. Our belief and foundation of what love truly looks like comes from the Bible, (1 Corinthians 13:4-7) and was by no mistake spoken at our wedding ceremony. While many can recite this verse from memory, after its initial utterance, it is soon forgotten or worse signifigance is lost as a modern day colloquilaism. We decided together that the survival of this love requires the watchful eye from the heavens above and the willingness, on both our parts, to continually examine, nurture and grow together.

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 (photo credit Diemstudiosinc)

So far, our young marriage has been the most challenging yet rewarding and eye-opening time in our lives. We have already learned so much about each other as individuals and as a couple and our faith grows stronger. Through it all, it all comes back to the root of it all, love.

 I took the time to write this is because perhaps this may be somewhat of a revelation, cause for deeper relational introspection or hopefully ring true to your marriage/partnership before becoming a Brand New Mom.

 So what is love to you and your partner?